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To have hate in your heart is to be in hell.

Posted: March 31st, 2023, 5:42 pm
by Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
This is a discussion forum topic for the November 2022 Philosophy Book of the Month, In It Together: The Beautiful Struggle Uniting Us All.


In my earlier topic, Whether you are looking for a savior or someone to save, or both, look into a mirror. In that topic, I write, in part:

Scott wrote: December 9th, 2022, 6:22 pm Many times, people aren't really looking to be happy--meaning to have consistent inner peace--but rather looking for an excuse or scapegoat for their misery.

There's no shortage of unhappy people wanting to give you advice, if not put a literal or metaphorical gun to your head and force you to take their literally miserable advice and live by their literally miserable standards. Many would rule the world because they cannot rule themselves, at least not in a way that lets them be truly happy with inner peace.

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The false miserable idea that the world is awful and desperately needs to be saved--by any means necessary no matter how aggressively violent and brutal--is typically a symptom of the violent saver's own persistent deep-rooted misery, meaning their lack of the true happiness that is inner peace and spiritual freedom.

Once we see that, it becomes easier to understand how even the Nazis thought they were the good guys, whose ends justified their means. So too is it surely true of the brutal murderers committing brutal honor killings. The destructive bloody horror of what such a person honestly sees as 'doing good ' reflects the spiritual misery in their own heart and the horrible self-created hell in which they themselves live.

I have hate in my heart for nobody. To have such hate in your heart is be in hell, and we see that miserable hellish hate manifest accordingly in people's actions. They don't just hurt those hate because to hate at all to hate reality itself as a whole; it's to look at the world as a timeless whole and say, "if this (i.e. timeless reality as an eternal unchanging whole) was created by a God, that God did bad job."

In some ways, I can sympathize with the most brutal most of all. I don't wish to be like them, but sometimes I can most easily say of them: Forgive them, for they know what they do. That is because, in a way, they are the most misguided. While it is mostly if not entirely self-created, they are utterly blinded by their own deep hellish suffering and their own lack of spiritual freedom. The miserable dominate the world because they lack self-discipline. The miserable want to dominate and control the world because the lack true self-determination.

In the words of Alan Watts, all the do-gooders are troublemakers.

For those who follow the teachings of my book, whether because they read it or just happen to otherwise, the opposite is the case. We have the consistent true happiness that is inner peace and spiritual freedom (a.k.a. self-discipline). Our loving free-spirited inner peace is reflected in our actions, our art, our kindness, and even our eyes. You can see it and feel it when you talk to one of us, or even when you sit in silence nearby. We have heaven in our hearts. Our cups overflow with it. We can't help but spill some of it on you.


With love,
Scott






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Re: To have hate in your heart is to be in hell.

Posted: April 1st, 2023, 1:07 am
by Damian Keyes
I agree with your sentiments. In my life, I had to embrace inner peace instead of chaos. To carry around rage because of what someone did to you is only going to hurt you. I can admit that forgiveness has freed my soul from bondage. Now I'm properly able to live my life with that weight off my heart and mind.

Re: To have hate in your heart is to be in hell.

Posted: April 1st, 2023, 2:22 am
by Stoppelmann
Hate involves an appraisal that a person or group is evil. While hate relates to other negative emotions, it also has some unique features, such as the motivation to eliminate the object of your hate. Revenge is often a part of hate, because the idea behind revenge is to want to hurt the person/group as much as you have been hurt by them. Instead of focusing on hate, it’s better to focus on positive emotions like love and compassion and work towards making the world a better place.

On the other hand, I hate the fact that there are predators in society, who prey on children and women, who exploit people and cause suffering, who react to love and compassion with contempt and more ill-will. I know it can be difficult to deal with these issues and that it’s natural to feel angry or frustrated. So, my hate is directed towards a situation rather than particular people, and wanting to rid society of this situation, rather than picking up the pieces after the damage is done, seems to be more productive than positive emotions.

Re: To have hate in your heart is to be in hell.

Posted: April 14th, 2023, 9:29 am
by Catalina Isabel
Hate is such a strong word, and the feeling of hating someone feels like physical pain. It disrups our inner happiness. I think it's impossible to be at peace and still have hate in our heart. I do agree with you here.

We may dislike what someone has said or done, but not feel hate towards them. How other people act is their choice, but how we react is ours.

Re: To have hate in your heart is to be in hell.

Posted: April 14th, 2023, 1:58 pm
by Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
Catalina Isabel wrote: April 14th, 2023, 9:29 am How other people act is their choice, but how we react is ours.
Wisely said! :D

Re: To have hate in your heart is to be in hell.

Posted: April 23rd, 2023, 4:48 pm
by Sophia_D_Ajayi
This statement just reminded me of something that happened in 2020.
A childhood friend of mine betrayed me so badly. I was hurt. The love I had for her immediately grew into hatred. I hated her so much because I couldn't believe how much she fooled me for 7 years. I started nurturing that hatred. Anyone I met that knew her in some way, I'd immediately warn them about her. It got so bad that I started fantasizing about beating her up.

Unknown to me, I was beginning to turn to a bitter person because of the hate I had for her. It took me a while to finally realize how much damage that hate had caused. I had to start learning how to forgive and move on.

I'm glad I really forgave her and moved on, because I was gradually turning into a mean person.

There's really no positive outcome in holding grudges and nurturing hate. Just try to move on, you'll see how peaceful life can be.

Re: To have hate in your heart is to be in hell.

Posted: April 24th, 2023, 4:09 am
by Catalina Isabel
Sophia_D_Ajayi wrote: April 23rd, 2023, 4:48 pm This statement just reminded me of something that happened in 2020.
A childhood friend of mine betrayed me so badly. I was hurt. The love I had for her immediately grew into hatred. I hated her so much because I couldn't believe how much she fooled me for 7 years. I started nurturing that hatred. Anyone I met that knew her in some way, I'd immediately warn them about her. It got so bad that I started fantasizing about beating her up.

Unknown to me, I was beginning to turn to a bitter person because of the hate I had for her. It took me a while to finally realize how much damage that hate had caused. I had to start learning how to forgive and move on.

I'm glad I really forgave her and moved on, because I was gradually turning into a mean person.

There's really no positive outcome in holding grudges and nurturing hate. Just try to move on, you'll see how peaceful life can be.
Wow, thanks for sharing that. It's great that you realised how negatively it was affceting you, and managed to move on. Very true that hate can hurt you more than it does the other person.

Re: To have hate in your heart is to be in hell.

Posted: May 2nd, 2023, 2:06 am
by sam_rahman12
Sophia_D_Ajayi wrote: April 23rd, 2023, 4:48 pm This statement just reminded me of something that happened in 2020.
A childhood friend of mine betrayed me so badly. I was hurt. The love I had for her immediately grew into hatred. I hated her so much because I couldn't believe how much she fooled me for 7 years. I started nurturing that hatred. Anyone I met that knew her in some way, I'd immediately warn them about her. It got so bad that I started fantasizing about beating her up.

Unknown to me, I was beginning to turn to a bitter person because of the hate I had for her. It took me a while to finally realize how much damage that hate had caused. I had to start learning how to forgive and move on.

I'm glad I really forgave her and moved on, because I was gradually turning into a mean person.

There's really no positive outcome in holding grudges and nurturing hate. Just try to move on, you'll see how peaceful life can be.


I have similar experiences in many of my friend groups. Suddenly, I couldn't recognise my own friends or even myself. Hate changes people for the worse and brings out a different kind of negativity that doesn't just go away. Thank you for sharing your experience. It helps me further understand how awful it is to keep hate within you, only to become the worst version of you.

Re: To have hate in your heart is to be in hell.

Posted: May 2nd, 2023, 9:42 am
by Yasmine M
Hate is a strong feeling that doesn't just stay in someone's heart rent free. Hate consumes and nurture itself. People who hate others will find themselves being passionate about it. They will find themselves thinking most of their day about the thing or the person they hate, they will make plans and act on it. It is consuming, it is like an addiction. We must learn to forgive and let go. Indeed having hate in your heart is to be in hell.

Re: To have hate in your heart is to be in hell.

Posted: May 2nd, 2023, 1:10 pm
by Cristina Corui Mihailescu
I agree with Scott's statement. I was married to someone whose main word was hate. He only saw enemies everywhere, he felt unjustly punished by fate, and he always felt miserable. He hated everyone except me, or maybe he sometimes hated me as well. I managed to keep my serenity against all odds. I kept saying that life is beautiful, that the people are nice and deserve to be loved. For a long while I succeeded in loving him. Then I broke up with him to preserve my inner happiness. There was no place for hate in my heart, there has never been. Hate is too strong a word. I can go on living only if I see the beauty in people, in nature, in everything.
Beauty IS in the eye of the beholder and I choose to see it.

Re: To have hate in your heart is to be in hell.

Posted: May 4th, 2023, 4:58 am
by NadiaBoateng
When you harbor hate, you emanate all kinds of negative vibes like envy, strife, malice etc. All these strong emotions can keep you in stagnancy and backwardness. Hate is a strong emotion, the opposite of love. Love builds, but hate destroys. Let us be more loving in our everyday affairs.

Re: To have hate in your heart is to be in hell.

Posted: May 25th, 2023, 2:23 am
by Bright U
Hate is such a terrible feeling. Allowing another person's existence control your emotions that much is such a miserable way to live life. It's probably worse than living in hell.

Re: To have hate in your heart is to be in hell.

Posted: May 28th, 2023, 5:36 pm
by Sonia Gonzalez
I agree with what you said. A long time ago, I went through some horrible things and I thought I was "over them", and that I was okay, but some events last year made me realize that I was suffering, not because of what I went through, but because of the anger and hatred I still felt.

Re: To have hate in your heart is to be in hell.

Posted: May 30th, 2023, 6:46 am
by Anil G
Sonia Gonzalez wrote: May 28th, 2023, 5:36 pm I agree with what you said. A long time ago, I went through some horrible things and I thought I was "over them", and that I was okay, but some events last year made me realize that I was suffering, not because of what I went through, but because of the anger and hatred I still felt.
I hope you find your peace soon over the time and not just over come with the those things but find the inner peace with it, so that whenever you think about it you won't get angry or hatred feelings but genuinely okay feeling.

Re: To have hate in your heart is to be in hell.

Posted: May 30th, 2023, 6:51 am
by Anil G
Hate is not just a feeling. Hate has a power to control a person, to do things which the person would not think about. Acceptance of hating is the first step a person can make to get relief from it and being good by working on it.