Philosophy Discussion Forums

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Victory Ositaorah wrote: ↑November 12th, 2023, 4:55 am How do you handle a salesperson who loses money twice and describes it as an error or miscalculation. The worker seems to be normal and hardworking.

Hi, Victory Ositaorah,

Thank you for your question.

How I would handle that kind of situation would vary greatly from case to case depending on the countless specific details of each case.

First and foremost by far, the main factor to consider is whether you are certain the person is not lying and/or stealing. In all relationships, including professional, personal, and romantic ones, honesty is the most important thing. If you catch a liar in a lie, I recommend terminating the relationship asap, no matter what the liar says and no matter what excuses or promises they make (e.g. "I'm so sorry!", "It was a one-time thing!", "It will never happen again!").

If you are very sure the person isn't lying and isn't stealing, and you are very sure the person is a very honest person, then you have someone who is exceptionally valuable on your hands. Most people aren't honest, and thus most people make terrible employees, terrible business partners, terrible friends, and terrible romantic partners. If you have someone who is honest in your life, that person is extremely valuable, and almost anything takes a backseat to the fact that the person is honest and therefore extraordinary.

If you are dealing with someone who is actually honest, then I would find a way to fix or side-step their incompetence at certain things (e.g. counting money or doing math). This may mean re-training them. This may mean moving them to a different position. It may mean demoting them, but still giving them a job that is generous considering their inability to reliably count money and make basic math calculations.

You will want to make adjustments to your process and procedures to prevent that from happening again, just like a computer programmer responding to a bug report will want to write a software update to prevent the same bug from happening again.

But, remember, that honesty is the most important thing. Being able to do math well or handle money well is not the most important thing. Give honest people who do math well and handle money well jobs that are related to doing math and handling money. For other honest people (i.e. honest people who are bad at handling money), remember how valuable and exceptional they are simply because they are honest, and find other roles more suited to them.

I hope this advice is helpful!

If you have any follow-up questions about this or have any other questions about anything at any time, please do ask.


With love,
Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
a.k.a. Scott






---
In addition to having authored his book, In It Together, Eckhart Aurelius Hughes (a.k.a. Scott) runs a mentoring program, with a free option, that guarantees success. Success is guaranteed for anyone who follows the program.

Many years ago, my husband and I owned a bar—bad decision. We employed people who were our friends. We started to notice that things did not add up. We questioned them, but of course, no one admitted to stealing. Then, I started to sit at the bar and watch every transaction. Sure enough, drinks weren't wrung up properly, change was not administered properly, etc. One person even pretended to wring up drinks but didn't, and I saw them put the money in their pocket! We were outraged and hurt as we thought these people were our friends and acquaintances. Some were fired, and some were given a stern warning that we knew what they were doing. Any business that has to do with money is too much of a temptation for people, especially if they are down on their luck.
It amazes me nowadays how if you pay for something in cash, the teenagers at the register will give you a blank stare and can't figure out your change, and you have to tell them- give me back a quarter, a dime, and four pennies.
There are people who are honest and just are not good with money, so you have to give them the benefit of the doubt before you fire them. Like you said, you might have to put them in another position where they can shine.

Hi Scott,

I currently reside in a country where, unfortunately, the economy has suffered significantly due to political corruption. Despite holding a prestigious position, I find the living conditions to be relatively poor. I was fortunate to receive an education at no cost, which I deeply appreciate. Given these circumstances, I am contemplating whether it would be more appropriate to continue serving my country or to consider relocating. Could you please provide some guidance or insights on this matter?

Thank You

If you haven't already, you can sign up to be personally mentored by Scott "Eckhart Aurelius" Hughes at this link.

Juma Florence wrote: ↑November 12th, 2023, 6:22 am In your book 'In It Together, you say that "there is no problem with evil because there is no evil.” Can you explain why you believe that there is no evil?

Hi, Juma Florence,

Yes, I explained that in more detail at:

What the word "evil" means to me, and why I believe evil (as I use the term) does not exist.


If you don't agree (which is fine), then I strongly encourage to reply to each of the six questions in the following topic:

Six Questions for People Who Believe Should-Not-Have-Ness Exists (i.e. for people who believe in 'shoulds' and 'oughts')



With love,
Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
a.k.a. Scott





---
In addition to having authored his book, In It Together, Eckhart Aurelius Hughes (a.k.a. Scott) runs a mentoring program, with a free option, that guarantees success. Success is guaranteed for anyone who follows the program.

This is a discussion forum topic for the Philosophy Book of the Month, In It Together: The Beautiful Struggle Uniting Us All.

Abbra Marsh wrote: ↑November 14th, 2023, 10:55 am If you see the mind being a terrible master [but a wonderful servant], what do you think about taking spontaneous actions i.e. acting first without being mindful of consequences or outcomes?

Hi, Abbra Marsh,

Thank you for your question!

Your question touches on four different things:

(1) overthinking

(2) free-spirited creativity, which might be what you refer to as "spontaneous action"

(3) useful and helpful thinking, i.e. thinking that is not overthinking

(4) underthinking, i.e. sloppily and carelessly doing something by way of not using useful and helpful thinking when such thinking would be genuinely be useful and helpful


An example of #4 (underthinking) might be this: randomly moving your pieces on a chess board while playing chess instead of taking some time to think about your strategy and next move, or randomly betting random amounts while playing poker or randomly playing cards while playing cards. Where an example of 'overthinking' might be worrying about the proverbial cards you are dealt, 'underthinking' might be sloppily playing the cards you are dealt.

Keep in mind, overthinking isn't so much about how much you think. It's not so one-dimensional. Instead, to use an unpleasant but useful analogy, it's analogous the difference between consensual sex and rape. Virtue isn't in the middle. It's not about balance. When people read my poem What Grace Means to Me and respond by saying "virtue is in the middle" or "it's all about balance", they have totally and utterly misunderstood me. Both here and in that poem, I am not only not saying that, but also I'm basically saying the exact opposite. I encourage you to see 'overthinking' versus 'thinking' as being as different as 'rape' versus 'consensual sex'. Underthinking is like having too little consensual sex. It's not one dimensional. It's not about balance.

In another analogy, it's like the difference between an alcoholic abusing alcohol versus a non-addicted person drinking alcohol non-abusively. It's not about who drinks more. It's not about how much you drink. Alcoholism and abusive drinking is not simply drinking too much; to see it that way would be fallaciously one-dimensional. Becoming spiritually free (i.e. breaking free of all addictions such as alcoholism or food addiction or sex addiction or overthinking) isn't about how much you do any one thing (e.g. thinking, sex, drinking, eating, etc.).

Even if the behavior has an aspect that is same--e.g. drinking, thinking, having sex--the difference of which I speak is about the difference between (1) abuse, addiction, and spiritual slavery versus (2) peaceful non-abusive spiritual freedom (a.k.a. self-discipline). It's the difference between freedom and oppression; and when you mix that with a second thing such as a behavior like drinking, thinking, or having sex, then that creates a second dimension which makes any one-dimensional thinking about the matter fallacious.

Nonetheless, a useful heuristic is to imagine that thinking as extremely expensive and exhausting. How ever expensive and exhausting you believe thinking actually is, learn to imagine that it's 100x more expensive and exhausting, in terms of time, money, and energy combined. Then make your decisions accordingly as if that was true--because likely it is and you are just terribly underestimating the true cost and repercussions of thinking. Then you will be able to easily learn to be more stingy with thinking while still hesitantly using it when it could actually be a helpful.

Before I continue, please do re-read the four different things above and remember we are talking about four different things, not two different things.

Due to human's evolved tribalism, and just general evolved tendency towards rushed sloppy stereotyping (i.e. jumping to conclusions and beliving them with extreme overconfidence, close-mindedness, and a strong engagement in confirmation bias), humans tend to think of things as one-dimensional even when they aren't (And they usually aren't one-dimensional) and then tend to think of them as binary (i.e. black and white) when they aren't. This is exemplified and epitomized by both the common "us versus them" mentality in humans and the frequency with which humans make or fall for false dichotomy fallacies.

As a result, when we have a scenario like the above in which there are four different things (not two), what happens is that many humans pretend that one or two of those things doesn't exist, so that they can then falsely see the issue as a black-and-white binary thing, thereby creating a false dichotomy fallacy.

So look at each of the four thing and consider each of the four things in the numbered list above.

I recommend making a very diligent effort to avoid #1 above. I would recommend you put your primary focus there, by a large margin.

As a human, I don't think there's much risk of #4. Telling a human to watch out for #4 is like telling an alcoholic to watch out for under-drinking or a sex addict to watch out for the problem of having too little sex. Worst case, so be it. In other words, when in doubt, I suggest the human err on the side of underthinking, the alcoholic err on the side of underdrinking, and the sex addict err on the side of having too little sex with too few partners.

Here is a great way to make use of #3 (i.e. the fact that the mind can be a wonderful servant, like a super cellphone or a super desktop computer): Schedule your thinking and planning, to happen at a specific time and place for a limited pre-set duration. This is analogous to how someone with a drinking problem might make a new rule for themselves to only drink on the weekends, or only drink socially and never alone. I recommend you set a literal timer when you start your thinking/brainstorming/planning session so that you can be sure to stop once the maximum planned time is reached.

For example, you could plan to sit down every Tuesday for 1 hour to go over your personal financial budget and finances, to make adjustments and plans and analyze it.

Likewise, if you have something specific about which you want to brainstorm and ponder one time or some big decision to make (e.g. whether to take a new job offer, whether to sell your house, how to make more friends, what to do about your romantic relationship, etc.), then you can decide that you will sit down for a certain amount of time (e.g. 1 hour) and do the thinking and planning about that thing at that time for that amount of time. It's like scheduling a business meeting with yourself (or selves, plural, if you are in touch with the normal healthy degree of multiple personality disorder that every single human has), with a clear agenda about what is to be discussed and decided at the meeting.

By doing that, you can still access the incredible power and usefulness of thinking, while still easily avoiding doing things like anxiously ruminating in your mind about all sorts of different nonsense when you lay in bed at night.

In an important way, scheduling your thinking helps you be more stringent about not thinking the rest of the day and week. A good thing about doing some very limited thinking with a timer set is that then you can get the thinking out of the way so that you can more securely avoid thinking the rest of the time. A little bit of thinking can be a great way to more easily avoid overthinking, similar to how scheduling their eating and adjusting their diet to eat a little more each day can actually help someone on a diet stick to their diet. It is not about how much you do the thing, whatever it is, but rather why you do it, and whether you are a happy free-spirit exercising self-discipline and enjoying inner peace while you do it or a spiritual slave or oppressor who is abusing, especially in the sense of abusing yourself.

Addicts are full of excuses and rationalizations, so recovering from your addiction (which in in this case is an addiction to thinking) entails being extremely cynical towards your own mind.

For instance, it's easy for your lying rationalizing addicted mind to falsely excuse overthinking as healthy helpful useful thinking, especially if you haven't been scheduling your actual helpful useful thinking for specific times and sticking to your schedule. If you struggle with maintaining a healthy body weight, I suggest you schedule your eating and meal-plan in advance and only eat at the scheduled times. Likewise, if you are a human at all, I suggest you schedule your thinking in advance, and (within reason) do your absolute best to avoid any thinking at any other time then the scheduled times.

To illustrate, if you never schedule your thinking for bedtime and never schedule it to take place in the bed, then your addicted mind will struggle to excuse any thinking at that time or at the place. It will be easier for you to catch it thinking and return yourself to practicing conscious presence if you know that thinking is not scheduled for that time or place. The same goes for anywhere else besides the scheduled time and place that you might otherwise find yourself getting lost in anxious thought, instead of grounded in peaceful spirit and conscious presence. Keeping your mind on a tight schedule can help you remain the free-spirited master of your mind rather than its miserable imprisoned servant, slaving away anxiously while it yells all its anxious nonsense about its anxious endless ever-changing goals. Don't even treat your mind like an equal partner, because it will be an abusive one, who tells you you are never good enough and that nothing's ever good enough. It's truly a terrible master.

I say this now to all humans as a comrade in the beautiful common struggle that unites us all: Don't ever sell your freedom to your mind, no matter what it promises you. The future with which it's so obsessed as so important is a false idol. The greener grass it seeks will always be on the other side, always a littler further in the future, a future that never comes, a hypothetical imaginary future where the mind is finally satisfied where all goals have been achieved and all desires satiated, where the mind would finally say things are good enough. Things are never good enough for the mind. Your time-bound future-obsessed death-fearing egotistical comparative competitive human mind cannot give you inner peace and true happiness. The thinking mind cannot give you the true happiness that is wonderful consistent inner peace. Rather, that wonderful consistent inner peace is exactly what you lose when you get lost in thought and sell yourself to your lying mind and its tyrannical anxious missions. In other words, it's exactly what you lose when you stop being consciously present in your unique present, with infinite duality-transcending gratitude and unconditional duality-transcending love. Practice presence, and rebelliously free yourself from the thinking tyrannical anxious mind.

It can be a wonderful servant, when used sparingly without addiction while you stay firmly present and awake above it, but it is a terrible master.


With love,
Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
a.k.a. Scott





In addition to having authored his book, In It Together, Eckhart Aurelius Hughes (a.k.a. Scott) runs a mentoring program, with a free option, that guarantees success. Success is guaranteed for anyone who follows the program, both for the free option and the paid option.

' ... It is not about how much you do the thing, whatever it is, but rather why you do it, and whether you are a happy free-spirit exercising self-discipline and enjoying inner peace while you do it or a spiritual slave or oppressor who is abusing, especially in the sense of abusing yourself. ...' - Wow! I couldn't agree more with these lines.

If you haven't already, you can sign up to be personally mentored by Scott "Eckhart Aurelius" Hughes at this link.

Moisés Alcántara Ayre wrote: ↑November 15th, 2023, 7:21 am Scott,
I'd like to know about your core values and how they have a pathway for your life in general.

Hi, Moisés Alcántara Ayre,

Thank you for your question.

I believe that one was actually also answered in my reply to the following question:

When hiring people, what are the personal and professional qualities that you think are most critical?


Even though the above question was asked in the context of business and hiring people for a paid job, that specification is arbitrary and can be safely ignored when reading my answer in the above post. In other words, it's the same qualities that I will use to choose and refuse candidates when 'hiring' (i.e. choosing) friends and romantic partners, even though I don't pay them. Likewise, they would be the same qualities I would look for when choosing to take a job working for someone else (i.e. they pay me) or to form a business partnership (i.e. we don't pay each other but make money together).

Whether or not someone is being paid and which way the money is going has no effect on what my core values are (e.g. honesty) and what my universal deal-breakers are (e.g. a person being dishonest).

Aside from the above linked answer, a more complete description of my core values and how they manifest in my life (i.e. the pathways they have in my life) is explained in my book, particularly via the 11 numbered suggestions at the end of the book.

In other words, the main way these core values of mine get manifested in my life is by me following the 11 suggestions in my book.

The advice I give in my book, including each of the 11 numbeed suggestions at the end, aren't given as me saying do what I say not what I do. Rather, quite the opposite: I simply explain the self-chosen rules I choose to live by, so that those who would wish to emulate me can choose to do as I do, and thus also enjoy the wonderful unwavering true happiness that I do, day in and day out.


With love,
Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
a.k.a. Scott






---
In addition to having authored his book, In It Together, Eckhart Aurelius Hughes (a.k.a. Scott) runs a mentoring program, with a free option, that guarantees success. Success is guaranteed for anyone who follows the program.

Risper Ouma Lisa Anyango wrote: ↑November 19th, 2023, 7:17 am What inspired you to create online book club and turn it into an internet based company given the fact that the digital error wasn't so famous at the time of it's creation.

Hi, Risper Ouma Lisa Anyango,

I believe that question was answered already:

What was your motivation for creating OnlineBookClub?


With love,
Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
a.k.a. Scott

Eckhart Aurelius Hughes wrote: ↑November 26th, 2023, 2:30 pm What's my vision for Scott's/Eckhart's future? This is extremely similar and analogous to asking me what my vision is for my children's future. What do I want my son to be when he grows up? What do I want my daughter to be? What jobs do I want them to have? What kind of spouses do I want them to marry? Do I even want them to get married? College? Hobbies? Habits?

Being a control freak goes hand-in-hand with having a miserable savior complex, and both are indicative of one lacking self-responsibility, lacking self-discipline, and lacking the wonderful true happiness that is free-spirited inner peace. When one feels out of control of themselves (i.e. feels like a miserable spiritual slave or prisoner rather than a happy free spirit), then one compensates by being a control freak towards others, including one's future self. Consider the seemingly out of control binge eater or drinker on the weekend who claims thier Monday-self will go on an extreme diet starting Monday and controllingly expects their Monday-self to actually do that and follow that draconian, authoritarian, miserable diet. Taking undue responsibility of what tomorrow-me does would be a symptom of today-me failing to take self-responsibility for what today-me is doing, right here right now, in his unique present; trespassing on your neighbor's backyard to force him to make it your version of clean is usually just a way to distract yourself from your failure to make your own yard match your own version of clean.

That kind of miserable controlling judging desperate taking of undue responsibility (and judgement) of others is a symptom, excuse, and cause of the control freak's lack of self-responsibility and lack of self-discipline and corresponding lack of the true happiness that comes with such free-spirited self-responsibility.

[...]

I say all that just to say these two things:

#1 -- My top priority is in being truly happy in my unique present right here, right now. It's not future Scott's/Eckhart's happiness, and it's not even my kids' happiness now or in their future. That's their responsibility and their freedom, both in terms of my kids and my older future self.

[...]

#2 -- My plan is not to worry about what cards I will be dealt, but to just teach myself the fundamental habits of figurative card playing so that no matter what those cards are I can follow my plan of doing the following: Unconditionally and fully accepting those cards and playing them the best I can.

Shirley Labzentis wrote: ↑November 26th, 2023, 4:53 pm Hi Scott,
One thing I have learned in my life of 72 years is that you cannot control what your children do in life. You may want them to go to college, but they will drop out. You may want them to marry someone, but they will marry someone totally wrong for them. You may offer advice, but they don't take it. You may disagree with their parenting skills, but cannot do anything about it. Your grandchildren will do whatever they want to, good or bad, and it's out of your hands. Life is short and after you have raised your children and they are out on their own, be happy with yourself and your life. Do things that make you happy. It sounds like you are happy with your life now and I commend you for being a full-time dad, but you should try and let the control freak part of you ease off. You will only be disappointed in your future self and that of your children.

[Emphasis and Color Added.]

Hi, Shirley Labzentis,

I have no idea what caused you to think I am a control freak or that I was endorsing that behavior.

I suspect you somehow misread my above post as saying the exact opposite of what it was actually saying.

As for you telling me that I 'should" not be a control freak (which I'm not anyway), with a friendly playful smile, I say to you:

Don't should on me. If you are going to should on anyone, go should all over yourself.




With love,
Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
a.k.a. Scott

Okoth Omondi wrote: ↑November 27th, 2023, 10:43 am Could you delve into the inspiration behind your book? Additionally, I'm curious to learn more about your writing process – the methods and approaches you employed to bring your creative vision to life.

Hi, Okoth Omondi,

Thank you for your questions.

These questions may have already been answred in the following Q&As:


In the five years you were working on writing "In It Together", how were you able to get yourself into "the zone" when you wanted to work on your book? How do you get into that headspace and start writing such profound words?


Your book is so profound. It just contains one profound paragraph after another. And I can just imagine the mental fatigue that you would go through writing those. So, how do you do it? How do you avoid getting mental fatigue?


What was the most challenging part of writing "In It Together"? How long did it take you?


How many hours per week did you spend creating your book, In It Together? What were some inspirations that you used?


What was the most difficult or challenging part of writing In It Together?


If the above Q&As don't answer your question, or if you have any other follow-up questions, please do let me know.



With love,
Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
a.k.a. Scott

Sushan wrote: ↑November 28th, 2023, 6:04 am Hi Scott,

I currently reside in a country where, unfortunately, the economy has suffered significantly due to political corruption. Despite holding a prestigious position, I find the living conditions to be relatively poor. I was fortunate to receive an education at no cost, which I deeply appreciate. Given these circumstances, I am contemplating whether it would be more appropriate to continue serving my country or to consider relocating. Could you please provide some guidance or insights on this matter?

Thank You

[Emphasis added.]

Hi, Sushan,

Thank you for your question!

Can you explain in a bit more detail what you mean by the word 'serving' in your question above?

I suspect that word, and what you mean by it precisely, is a key word in your question and will become a significant factor in how I choose to answer.


With love,
Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
a.k.a. Scott

Hi Scott,
Have you ever met someone and without them speaking at all, you get a bad vibe off of them, and you immediately do not like this person. This has happened to me in my life several times. I try not to judge these people, as I don't know them, but I can't shake this feeling. It might not happen right away or months later, but something will always come out about this person that is not great. Is it intuition? Is this person emitting evil vibes? I don't know. What do you think? Can I unconditionally love this person? I can't no matter how hard I try, I can't brush off this ill feeling that I get whenever I come in contact with this person or persons.

I haven’t been able to get points for posting on this forum, I need to know if there’s anything wrong.

Eckhart Aurelius Hughes wrote: ↑November 30th, 2023, 1:45 pm

Sushan wrote: ↑November 28th, 2023, 6:04 am Hi Scott,

I currently reside in a country where, unfortunately, the economy has suffered significantly due to political corruption. Despite holding a prestigious position, I find the living conditions to be relatively poor. I was fortunate to receive an education at no cost, which I deeply appreciate. Given these circumstances, I am contemplating whether it would be more appropriate to continue serving my country or to consider relocating. Could you please provide some guidance or insights on this matter?

Thank You

[Emphasis added.]

Hi, Sushan,

Thank you for your question!

Can you explain in a bit more detail what you mean by the word 'serving' in your question above?

I suspect that word, and what you mean by it precisely, is a key word in your question and will become a significant factor in how I choose to answer.


With love,
Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
a.k.a. Scott

Hi Scott,

Sorry for the delayed response.

My country provides both free education and free health. I got my education for free and became a doctor. Now I am a part of that free health (although I am given a salary for my job). So I believe that I am serving back to my country and my people, and paying back for what my country gave me. That is what I meant by the word 'serving'.

Thank you

Sushan

Hi Scott,
I know that you must have spent countless hours in OnlineBookClub at the start, but I am curious as to how many hours you devote to it now. How deep into it do you get? Are you constantly checking and overseeing every post and problem, or are you letting your excellent staff handle everything and they come to you if they can't handle something?