Sculptor1 wrote: ↑November 13th, 2021, 1:25 pm
Belindi wrote: ↑November 13th, 2021, 12:45 pm
Sculptor1 wrote: ↑November 13th, 2021, 8:30 am
Belindi wrote: ↑November 13th, 2021, 7:43 am
I imagine that if mood is the cause of bad behaviour, CBT is unlikely to change much behaviour. Bad moods are often caused not by lack of reasoning but by hormonal changes , illness, reasonable fears, or fatigue.
But bad moods create the hormonal changes, so modifying your behaviour changes the production of hormones.
This is a no brainer CBT works .
One method is to acknoweldge subconscious fears, rather than allow them to fester and change your cheminstry. KNowing what bothers and and owning that helps you deal with problems and avoid them.
We all know that avoiding a fight in the street means that your body will not produce the adrenaline that joining the fight would initiate. The same is true of many other situations.
Your mental state is not a cause of chemistry, it is the chemistry. Moods and chemistry go hand in hand.
Bad moods may be caused by some ideas, and there may be evidence that a bad mood causes lasting physical effects. I would not know.
There are a lot of bad moods that originate willy nilly in biological events such as premenstrual tension, lack of sleep, or low blood sugar.
All true, but being "mindful" of those biological causes and acknowledging them for what they are, offers a better coping mechanism than not recognising them.
I remember of several occassions being in the deep midst of a completely irrational arguement with my female partner and realising in the middle that it was that time of the month. Most of my partners accepted my observations and we were able to draw back on the heat of the debate. There was one woman that took it as an insult and was never able to let herself make an adjustment for her irrationality.
I get irritable myself as I have a problem with chronic neck pain and subconsciously ignore it for several hours. Eventually it is too much but this often expresses itself as shortness in temper. Luckily my partner knows why and understands. But I have ot be reminded sometimes.
I heartily agree that possessing insight into one's own bad moods makes the bad moods more bearable. Put another way, if I can be objective about my bad mood I can go to sleep, drink water, eat some food, remind myself of what I do next, and so forth. I had not known that CBT taught people to be objective in the sense of insight into the causes of their own moods.
The remedies I listed above are physical depending as they do on the belief the bad mood originates in the body including the brain. I'd feel uncomfortable about some authority figure in a metaphorical white coat telling me my ideas about my outer environment are wrong and that is why I am in a bad mood.
If the white-coated authority tells me my behaviour XYZ is dangerous and alternative PQR behaviour is how I can be more safe and more happy I'd find that a lot more credible than being told changing my mind will sort my mood problem. I imagine CBT is designed for people who have decided to change their behaviour but CBT is not for people who are required to change their minds. Your intransigent friend who could not take your advice perhaps had that sort of personality, or else the trait was a feature of the relationship itself.
(Just a thought about your neck, did you ever try a 'heat lamp' ? (Called infra red to help to not confuse it with an ultra violet lamp) . Physiotherapists used to use them to alleviate local musculo-skeletal pain. )