Philosophy Discussion Forums | A Humans-Only Club for Open-Minded Discussion & Debate

[Sushan]

Various factors can hinder the expression of our true authentic selves, including societal norms, fear of judgment or rejection, self-doubt, past traumas, and external pressures to conform. Embracing one's true self often requires courage, self-awareness, and acceptance of vulnerability.

Some individuals authentically believe that there are rules which they must and ought to obey. If these rules are not obeyed, the individual who fails to pay attention to them will not only be scorned for himself but his family, friends, and business associates will be tainted.Such an individual is a true self.

Other individuals authentically believe that feelings are to be trusted whether or not their feelings lead to dangerous and risky behaviour. Such an individual is a true self.

There is also the sort of person who tempers their feelings with reason and does not get carried away by their passions. This is also a true self.

The ideas of Sigmund Freud's id, ego, and superego offer a psychological framework for comprehending these various forms of "true selves." The superego, the area of our brain that internalizes morals and societal norms, may be aligned with the person who maintains that regulations should be rigidly followed. This could account for the strong sense of accountability they have for both their deeds and the impression they give off to people around them.

Those who follow their instincts, however, may be doing so because they believe in their feelings, even if they cause them to act dangerously. As our primordial inclinations push us towards instant gratification regardless of the consequences, Freud thought the id to be a representation of our nature. It's more motivated by impulses and desires, even though this can be considered an authentic self.

The Aristotelian concept of 'phronesis', or practical wisdom, comes to mind when one considers the third sort of person, who tempers their emotions with reason. According to Aristotle, a well-rounded person develops virtues by striking a balance between their feelings and rational thought. This is in line with what we view as a balanced way of living—one that neither rejects emotions nor allows them to carelessly guide decisions.

These personality types' conflicts have historically been seen in a lot of societies. Think about the rigid moral standards of some historical periods, such as Victorian England, where people were held to high standards not only for their personal conduct but also for the ways in which their deeds affected their families and communities. The countercultural movements of the 1960s, on the other hand, encouraged people to reject these strict conventions and instead follow their feelings and desires more freely.

[Sushan]

I refer to a rather powerful question raised on page 64 by the author. I feel this engagement is a rather critical point in the book.

"Ask yourself this question: What stops me from unleashing the freedom and the power of my true authentic self?"

My answer: I have stopped me, for a long time, from unleashing the freedom and power of my true authentic self for many years. This was mainly a reaction to existence.
I enjoyed my solitude a lot growing up as I learned that I was able to be myself without being harshly criticized or judged. As I grew older, I developed many masks to hide behind. I buried myself in fantasy books until I found things about mind and spirit and psychology from various sources that empowered my awareness. I began to learn about actively choosing my paths, company, behavior, and lifestyle.

Being authentic began to dawn upon me, but this authenticity I found was not welcome even in my adult years in so many spheres. I realized, reading this book, that I had many masks that enabled my survival. Some were good, some so detrimental that they hindered my progress. However, as I have been courageously embracing my "angels and demons," I have been finding my peace. I have also been seeing more pieces to this unraveling by finding more people, books, and situations that align with my authentic path. So I am grateful beyond measure, for I know I am simply being truly me in my expression going forward; my unique path, and all the resources I need will continue to reveal themselves ( like this book and others related to this concept). I embrace my intuition and exercise it vigorously. I am growing to love everything, all the shadows and light and every inhale and exhale, for I acknowledge the divine play in the fabric of my existence

So is it still changing, this for true believed perception of self, good householder? And now, how does it come about now?


Where does it arise yet? And yet?

That's a really interesting question. It appears that you are enquiring as to whether the previously discussed developing sense of self is still changing and evolving at this time. In my opinion, this is definitely a continuous journey of self-discovery. Their description of accepting their "angels and demons" implies that this progress is a continuous process of becoming rather than a goal in itself.

As a matter of fact, authenticity itself frequently entails a constant balancing act between personal realizations and external demands. This metamorphosis, in my opinion, emerges in fresh opportunities for reflection and dialogue, where every encounter—even a breath—brings to light a fresh level of comprehension.

[Sushan]

It's hard to have freedom in my situation, but I have a dream that tells me I am already free. ...

That dreams is strong feed by what's known as dull and lazy, good householder. And if honest? Free means without need to feed an identification, without search for support of it, still.

You have a point, but I disagree. I see it differently from how you appear to infer that Imeegerlie's dream or their quest for a sense of freedom is a type of lethargy or dullness. They are not striving to maintain a flimsy identity or seek approval from others. Rather, they're negotiating the difficulties of obtaining independence in a society that frequently places restrictions on us. Dreams, particularly those that lead to liberation, can be extremely effective in inspiring actual, significant change.

I regard Imeegerlie as actively pursuing a greater awareness of self despite challenging circumstances—rather as being lazy. Sometimes the desire to move forward and overcome constraints is ignited by that faraway ideal of freedom. Being truly free is more than just separating from all identification.

[Sushan]

Truly where there is a will, there is a way. Nobody can limit anybody except one's self. I had the same reflection and discover that I am the person holding myself back. In reality noone can limit you even if they want to. The power is yours to use as it pleases you!

That's a good and important insight, good householder. Yet it's also good to know what's not worthy to relay on, not possible to serve as refuge, hardly brought under control, and as burdensome not wise to regard it as own. Good to start to love and maintain what's very own, since, as good householder saw, will is action, one's own, heritage. If no further higher wisdom applied, than this will lead toward the Brahmas, if knowing what good and bad.

Another can also not limit good householder to act foolish and bad as well. Goodness and evil-doing, and their results are his, nobody else in charge

You're correct when you say that it's critical to know what we can control. But I believe there is more nuance to this. Willpower is crucial, in fact. But saying that we have no limits would be oversimplifying the situation.

The environment, society, and other outside factors can have a significant effect on us. In certain cases, these constraints are beyond our direct control; take into account the ways in which certain individuals are constrained by environmental factors or systemic barriers. In these kinds of circumstances, overcoming the challenge requires more than just willpower.

I think that each of us is attempting to find a middle ground between acknowledging our limitations and accepting the things under our control. Realizing our limits is a necessary part of being free, in addition to having the will. Don't you think so?

[Sushan]

As for the OP-question "What stops me from unleashing the freedom and the power" (for long term happiness), it has to be said: wrong association.

Outwardly and inwardly "laying down" with the five evil friends (Nivaranas): sense-desire, ill-will, laziness, restlessness and doubt, hinders one to do any good work.

I understand how you may say that. To expand on this idea, I believe it's necessary to acknowledge that these "friends" frequently originate from within rather than the outside. All of us have experienced these things at different points in our lives. For example, whenever we try something new or venture beyond of our comfort zones, we typically experience anxiety and restlessness. Instead than trying to get rid of these problems entirely every time, it's imperative to deal with them. We can take steps to lessen their power over us as soon as we accept this.

[Sushan]

Your reflection on the challenges and triumphs of embracing one's authentic self provides a profound exploration of identity and personal growth. While I agree that individual self-awareness and authentic living are critical for personal development, the notion of being "truly oneself" in a societal context is inherently complex.

Philosophically, the idea that we wear 'masks' can be seen through various lenses. Existentialists, particularly Jean-Paul Sartre, talked about 'bad faith'—a concept where individuals deny their true nature to conform to societal expectations. You correctly identify that these masks, sometimes protective, can prevent us from fully and authentically experiencing life.

However, completely removing these masks might not always be practical or beneficial. Society functions with a certain level of expectation and conformity, which, while often restrictive, also provides a framework within which we operate and interact. Your struggle with the reception of your authenticity resonates with the existential challenge of finding a balance between individual authenticity and social acceptability.

Moreover, the journey to self-discovery and shedding these masks, as you describe, is not merely about personal liberation but also involves navigating the social fabric that might not always be receptive or supportive. This dichotomy raises important philosophical questions about the nature of freedom and the essence of personal identity.

In addition, while your approach emphasizes intuition and a personal spiritual journey, one might argue that a purely introspective path risks overlooking the broader societal and relational contexts that shape us.

How do we reconcile our internal journey with external influences? How can we foster environments that encourage both individual authenticity and communal harmony?

Once again, I find your view engaging. Thank you.
I agree that the view of the masks we wear can be beneficial in some instances. However, from my own life experience, I strongly believe that letting go of these masks is important in identifying the true meaning of my own individual path and purpose. The danger of relying on masks is that they can ultimately consume us, which is the reason/root cause of core societal issues.

In my view, as we progress and grow, letting go of certain masks will allow us to transform into a more authentic version of ourselves ( all masks serve a temporal purpose in life), as discussed in the Unfakeable Code. Sometimes, we will lean to certain masks as a crutch due to subconsciously clinging to survival ( from trauma), and it is important to deal with such situations honestly, fearlessly, and with love. A nonaccepting society is a group of individuals ( again, my view obtained from experience of very political environments) who depict dictative tendencies and complex issues amplified through their possession of specific resources, allowing them such control.

An authentic individual or one that is growing in this direction may not fit in environments because of the social structure; they will either let go of this environment and move on to new environments supporting their next phase of growth towards being authentic or influence the experience of others revealing their own authenticity in their original environment.

I firmly believe that some of us will never realize that such masks exist and connect deeply with who we are in our timeline, and this is simply their journey ( I cannot control anyone's decisions in this regard nor force them to see what I see, even if I believe it's for their souls benefit). I can only strongly follow my intuition and create my own path with all that I experience; this is what I choose for myself. I have been shunned in some environments for this, but I have taken the lessons and moved forward focused on my authentic experiences and expressions. I have seen the positive differences my experience and my choices in my existence have made over time; in the community and society I am in, there are these beautiful rewarding instances that make all difficulties worth it. I have developed new relationships and improved compassion and understanding in old ones ( while still embracing differences). I have learned much more about who I am and what I can achieve through simply being me with much love.

It’s really admirable how you’ve taught yourself to steer clear of unaccepting crowds and have nurtured new relationships that support your authentic self. Your journey resonates deeply with the themes explored in the movie *The Invention of Lying*. In this film, everyone in the world always tells the truth until one character discovers how to lie. This shift changes everything, highlighting how complex and challenging constant honesty can be, yet also showing the profound impact of authenticity.

Just like in the movie, where the protagonist’s discovery of lying introduces new dynamics to human relationships, your move towards authenticity in a sometimes inauthentic world can shift dynamics around you. It’s interesting to consider how much of our social structure relies on unspoken agreements about what truths are acceptable and what happens when someone breaks that mold.

Your experiences seem to echo the idea that being true to oneself, despite societal pressures, leads to richer and more meaningful interactions, much like the deeper truths the characters in the movie must confront once lying enters their world.

What do you think about the balance the movie strikes between the chaos caused by lying and the simplicity of truth? How does this compare to your experiences in navigating authenticity in real-world relationships?

Thank you, Sushan. I have stared into the abyss of monsters, darkness, and death, so to speak. My initial naivety, fears, and social conditioning have put me into some interesting corners of suffocation, and it is my love for the Divine that has led me out. I am eternally grateful now for all of it, as it has changed my view and strengthened me to forge forward in my journey. I resonate deeply with Rumi's poetry. When I look at the world and people despite the darkness projected, I choose to celebrate life and its essence of light. I keep on choosing love ( in its holistic essence). The more I choose it, the more I submit to the Divine essence; it feels right for me. As I choose to walk "( in authenticity/letting go of masks I used) " on the way, the way appears".

Concentrating too much on the darkness or delusions will simply allow it to consume you ( I have come close many times). The "Lord of The Rings (Trilogy by Peter Jackson)" happens to be one of my favorite cinematic translations of JRR Tolkien books. All of the good-natured characters are tested with the potential of evil on many levels throughout. We experience a wide range of outcomes based on what the characters choose ultimately. The one scene that sticks into my mind, in particular, is when Frodo, together with Sam and Gollum, travels through the wetlands (which contain a collection of pools with dead faces /"Dead Marshes), and Frodo stares at one of the "lights' (an illusion), his focus is actually on one of the dead faces, causing him to be entranced and he falls into the water, and the dead marshes nearly consumes his being.
Also, the popular quote, " He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss also gazes into you," surfaces to my mind. Focusing too long on battles with ourselves and with one's ego can lead to this fate. At some point, it helps to sit and observe yourself and your essence and find your " true north'.

It makes sense to seek the light of the truth and follow its lead.

I am very interested in searching for this movie, " The Invention of Lying." It sounds realistic and thought-provoking. Thanks for sharing it!! Based on your wonderful elaboration of its contents, I can tell you upfront that the only reason I believe the truth hurts is when we don't love ourselves enough to trust in who we truly are and express it, e.g I believe I am beautiful, but I will not fit everyone's idea of beautiful and the minute I start prioritizing and focusing on everyone else's destructive criticism, I break down ( I may end up spending money and my life trying to chase this acceptable "fleeting" idea of beauty). Lies allow us to fit in and avoid confrontation, it's an easy route to take and sometimes appears to be filled with the illusion of light and adventure.
Loving myself and accepting the reality that others may find me in whatever way they feel or see and judge, accepting this with peace and healthy assertion. yet choosing to focus on me and my essence, my path, and what my Creator has blessed me with allows me to keep moving forward on my journey with honor ( to my creator) and grace and "live" fully. This, for me, is worth my time.

I must disagree with your assertion that dwelling on struggles with the ego and oneself will eventually cause one to become overwhelmed by that darkness. In my view, facing one's ego and engaging in introspection are essential phases in the process of personal development. It matters more about 'how' you approach the abyss, if anything. In my opinion, the secret is to actively and intentionally interact with our darker selves without allowing them to rule us. Balance is key, not dodging.

Regarding the well-known phrase by Nietzsche that you cited, I believe there is a caveat: facing one's inner monster need not always be a negative thing. In fact, confronting your phobias, ego, and inner demons directly may actually make you more genuine. It happens when you yield to their will or deny them the possibility that you could be devoured.

What is your opinion on the notion that, with the correct attitude, the abyss might be a place of transformation instead of something to be feared?

[Sushan]

Your reflection on the challenges and triumphs of embracing one's authentic self provides a profound exploration of identity and personal growth. While I agree that individual self-awareness and authentic living are critical for personal development, the notion of being "truly oneself" in a societal context is inherently complex.

Philosophically, the idea that we wear 'masks' can be seen through various lenses. Existentialists, particularly Jean-Paul Sartre, talked about 'bad faith'—a concept where individuals deny their true nature to conform to societal expectations. You correctly identify that these masks, sometimes protective, can prevent us from fully and authentically experiencing life.

However, completely removing these masks might not always be practical or beneficial. Society functions with a certain level of expectation and conformity, which, while often restrictive, also provides a framework within which we operate and interact. Your struggle with the reception of your authenticity resonates with the existential challenge of finding a balance between individual authenticity and social acceptability.

Moreover, the journey to self-discovery and shedding these masks, as you describe, is not merely about personal liberation but also involves navigating the social fabric that might not always be receptive or supportive. This dichotomy raises important philosophical questions about the nature of freedom and the essence of personal identity.

In addition, while your approach emphasizes intuition and a personal spiritual journey, one might argue that a purely introspective path risks overlooking the broader societal and relational contexts that shape us.

How do we reconcile our internal journey with external influences? How can we foster environments that encourage both individual authenticity and communal harmony?

Once again, I find your view engaging. Thank you.
I agree that the view of the masks we wear can be beneficial in some instances. However, from my own life experience, I strongly believe that letting go of these masks is important in identifying the true meaning of my own individual path and purpose. The danger of relying on masks is that they can ultimately consume us, which is the reason/root cause of core societal issues.

In my view, as we progress and grow, letting go of certain masks will allow us to transform into a more authentic version of ourselves ( all masks serve a temporal purpose in life), as discussed in the Unfakeable Code. Sometimes, we will lean to certain masks as a crutch due to subconsciously clinging to survival ( from trauma), and it is important to deal with such situations honestly, fearlessly, and with love. A nonaccepting society is a group of individuals ( again, my view obtained from experience of very political environments) who depict dictative tendencies and complex issues amplified through their possession of specific resources, allowing them such control.

An authentic individual or one that is growing in this direction may not fit in environments because of the social structure; they will either let go of this environment and move on to new environments supporting their next phase of growth towards being authentic or influence the experience of others revealing their own authenticity in their original environment.

I firmly believe that some of us will never realize that such masks exist and connect deeply with who we are in our timeline, and this is simply their journey ( I cannot control anyone's decisions in this regard nor force them to see what I see, even if I believe it's for their souls benefit). I can only strongly follow my intuition and create my own path with all that I experience; this is what I choose for myself. I have been shunned in some environments for this, but I have taken the lessons and moved forward focused on my authentic experiences and expressions. I have seen the positive differences my experience and my choices in my existence have made over time; in the community and society I am in, there are these beautiful rewarding instances that make all difficulties worth it. I have developed new relationships and improved compassion and understanding in old ones ( while still embracing differences). I have learned much more about who I am and what I can achieve through simply being me with much love.

Shakespeare wrote Jaques' soliloque in As You Like It "All the World's a Stage". The stage at its best is about humanity and the conditions of human life: the stage, at its best, is not about people pretending that life is other than it is. Therefore the roles that we play throughout our lives are not to be viewed as masks hiding truth but as developments each one of which being appropriate to its time and place.
True, there are liars and cheats who do wear masks, but most people cooperate with each other.

Shakespeare wrote Jaques' soliloque in As You Like It "All the World's a Stage". The stage at its best is about humanity and the conditions of human life: the stage, at its best, is not about people pretending that life is other than it is. Therefore the roles that we play throughout our lives are not to be viewed as masks hiding truth but as developments each one of which being appropriate to its time and place.
True, there are liars and cheats who do wear masks, but most people cooperate with each other.

Shakespeare's portrayal of life as a stage where we all play roles may still hold truth, but it's nuanced. While most people do indeed cooperate and engage honestly, the propensity for deception cannot be overlooked. Research suggests that a small fraction of people, often with traits like Machiavellianism or psychopathy, are responsible for a disproportionate amount of lying and manipulation in society (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/deception). Moreover, deception can sometimes be seen as necessary to avoid harm or to smooth social interactions, though it can undermine trust and damage relationships (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/deception).

Considering these insights, do you think Shakespeare's view adequately captures the complexities of modern human behavior, or is it an idealized version that overlooks the darker aspects of human nature?

I think it's an idealised version: As You Like It is well named, it's a comedy. For the darker aspects we look at tragedies. Isn't it all right to laugh at ourselves as comparatively powerless beings swept along by time and tide? Both comedy and tragedy are good and true when the intention of the author is to tell the truth, and comedy and tragedy are bad and false when the intention of the author is to tell falsehoods or part truths in order enrich or empower herself to the disadvantage of others.

Masks, and role playing can be subjected to the same criterion,as any stories that we tell, that evaluating human behaviour should be based upon the intention of the agent of the behaviour.

Belinda,
An interesting view. Shakespeare's expression overall is interesting and has got me contemplating.
In terms of human drama, he is appealing to an audience's senses via the format of entertainment; I believe Shakespeare has reached many who grasp such content positively, deeply, impactfully, and on various levels in terms of an individual's context and perception level. Shakespeare makes sense to a degree for me in showing us yes that the world is a stage, but I do, however, believe that the range of characters on this stage is diverse and not all things that contribute to this play are predictable, nor does everything always follow a script. In this first and initial "stage", we as human beings are prescribed certain roles, often by societal/cultural norms. Some characters realize that this is not a "role" for them and return to these theatrical "masks" or simply break them; they create new ones, develop improv, or explore their own innate potential and start directing their own plays. Tragedies can either swallow us whole into a dark abyss, numb us, or refine our path (we ultimately choose).

You're right; the personalities are lot more nuanced than just stereotypes bound by societal norms. Shakespeare's tragedies, like "Hamlet" and "Macbeth," address this idea of going against the grain. The protagonists struggle with questions of fate, identity, and morality and usually face unexpected consequences in spite of their best efforts to control their fate.

I really like how you made the point that tragedies have the power to either make us stronger or weaker. This is similar to Nietzsche's concept of "amor fati," or the love of one's fate despite its challenges. It goes beyond simply admitting that we are victims of our situations; it also entails using them—even tragedies—to mold and create the person we are today.

As you pointed out, we can direct and improvise our own plays because we can recognize our authenticity.

[Sushan]

The main thing stopping me from being who I really want to be is my lack of self-discipline. I often do things I’m not proud of because I can't control myself

Your honesty about exercising self-control makes you relatable to many people. It can be challenging when we know what we want to do but are unable to overcome our own barriers. I think it's critical to remember that progress is what self-discipline is all about. We can take small steps to build it, like setting manageable goals or working on one habit at a time.

Have you ever tried focusing on the triggers that lead to those moments where you lose control? Sometimes, understanding the “why” behind those actions can give you a clearer sense of how to regain that control. It's a challenging process, but the fact that you recognize the issue is already a huge step forward. How do you plan to start working on building more discipline in your life?

[Sushan]

I feel like the location where I'm at has stopped me to an extent. Sometimes I just want to travel and try some stuff I really want to. Location is a factor for growth.

I can understand what you mean when you say that your place makes you feel constrained. Physical location could seem to be a barrier at times, preventing us from taking advantage of fresh chances or even from completely expressing ourselves.

Though physical location may be a constraint, it's also important to keep in mind that thinking might play a bigger role occasionally. Even in their existing environment, some individuals come up with inventive ways to pursue their passions. Have you considered taking on new challenges or learning something exciting to learn even from your current location as a way to "travel" psychologically or culturally?

Have you considered what experiences you hope to obtain or where you would like to go? You could start building your route in this way.

[EBERE WRITES COCEPT]

The question raised on page 64 resonated with me as well. I’ve also struggled with wearing different masks to fit in, suppressing parts of myself that felt too vulnerable to share. Growing up, I watched my mother navigate similar challenges—always selfless, but often holding back her true self for the sake of others. Seeing her slowly embrace her authenticity in later years inspired me to do the same. Like you, I’ve found that by acknowledging both my strengths and flaws, I’ve been able to embrace my path with more clarity and peace. It’s a continuous journey, but one that’s deeply fulfilling.

[Sushan]

The question raised on page 64 resonated with me as well. I’ve also struggled with wearing different masks to fit in, suppressing parts of myself that felt too vulnerable to share. Growing up, I watched my mother navigate similar challenges—always selfless, but often holding back her true self for the sake of others. Seeing her slowly embrace her authenticity in later years inspired me to do the same. Like you, I’ve found that by acknowledging both my strengths and flaws, I’ve been able to embrace my path with more clarity and peace. It’s a continuous journey, but one that’s deeply fulfilling.

It’s powerful how seeing someone else’s journey, especially a parent’s, can guide us toward accepting our own true selves. Growing up feeling the need to put on different “masks” can feel like a survival tactic at times, but it eventually becomes exhausting.

Suppressing parts of our identities can affect our mental health and cause emotions of anxiety or alienation, according to psychology. That you and your mother learnt to be honest is heartening. What unexpected effects do you think taking off these masks has had on your relationships?