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[Whitedragon]

Misty … Your words, are so true. I was deeply moved by your post, thank you. You have made a friend today.

Naughtorios, There is magic all around us; those who don't believe in magic will never find it. If you don't like the theist part of my life story, skip it and keep the part where one reality, (since I assume you're a realist too), meets another reality. You see Naughtorios; it's not just my and your reality we must keep in mind; it is the hosts of other people's thoughts out there, who would jump at our weaknesses. Moreover, I feel free since I stopped with porn; God has rewarded me with a free spirit. If only I could convey to you how boundless I am now … it's like I'm looking with new eyes at everything I see. It's like I'm here, but I'm not. If you don't care for theism, care for psychology … anyone here would be fools to say that sex does not impact one's identity and mind. I wanted to stop with the bad stuff a long time ago; but it had me; don't think God changed me over night … but with his power; I'm happy to say I am free now; I can still appreciate nude art or a good love story.

You said I am weak, you said my God is weak; there is nothing weak in doing what is right, doing what is right is difficult and hard, but now I'm reaping the fruit; and I've never tasted something so sweet. It is my reward for truly wanting to change; only God can move a man to follow such a thing through. Now pray tell, how am I or my God weak, since every day is a victory to me? Since every day I start talking to him is like being charged with glory, shining like a pulsar in the sky? Naughtorious I hope hope we can be friends too; you don't have to change for me and I don't have to change for you. We are both wise, let's not be at odds, please.

[Naughtorious]

We are both wise, let's not be at odds, please.

Here is a simple way to explain my position. There is a difference between hitting it up with a hot girl by yourself and hitting it up with a hot girl with a wingman. God is your wingman. If you cannot hit it up with the hot girl on your own. Then that strength you assume you have does not exist. You are weak based on this state of perception. You are reliant. You are not independent. Your wingman isn't even a real person. Thus this places you into the category where people use 'lucky charms' to psych themselves into winning.

I state this with well being.

[Whitedragon]

Naughtorious, God is not my wingman … I don't need God to hit it off, two years ago I did hit it off again with someone; and I can do it again. God is not my wingman he is my family. Besides, I think you and I can still exchange good philosophical conversation despite our religious orientations. I mourned Michelle for a long time, please try to appreciate another man's pain.

Let's start over? I like your new avatar. … The old one was also very striking. Maybe you can give me some advice; I have a hard time getting pictures that fit; how can I make them smaller. Sincerely WhiteDragon.

[Fleetfootphil]

Snore.

[Supine]

Granted, some of them I slept with … there I said it … and you know … it almost destroyed me.

I wanted to say, "You're a lucky man." Actually, I did just say it.

Hey, I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your significant other that was the great love of your life.

And then I asked myself one day … what if my beloved was a porn star or a prostitute …

You know... to me porn and prostitution were always - and are - logically the same thing. But it's interesting how the law differentiates between the two. I suppose, because one being theatrical can be designated as art.

As for people in porn not being happy I suspect that is true for many. The famed Mormon girl Bella Donna broke down crying in this interview (in part 1 or 2): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UriHw41mIAY

There is another female porn star - that considered becoming a nun earlier in her life - that I saw interviewed briefly. She struck me as a pretty happy young woman. I guess it depends on the person and dynamics. Though, it would not surprise me if the actresses in porn suffer from much higher rates of depression than the average work force or the average within the artistic and theatrical world.

-- Updated December 16th, 2012, 11:45 pm to add the following --

(Nested quote removed.)


Here is a simple way to explain my position. There is a difference between hitting it up with a hot girl by yourself and hitting it up with a hot girl with a wingman. God is your wingman. If you cannot hit it up with the hot girl on your own. Then that strength you assume you have does not exist. You are weak based on this state of perception. You are reliant. You are not independent. Your wingman isn't even a real person. Thus this places you into the category where people use 'lucky charms' to psych themselves into winning.

I state this with well being.

To be human is to have weaknesses, Naught, and I know you're intelligent enough to understand that.

So in relation to all this let me ask: What should be more forsaken: porn or hubris?

[Whitedragon]

For those of you who read my story of the potter, you know I am not unsympathetic to this topic. I know the hopes and fears and desires, because I was there. I don't want to stop the 'mercy water' for anyone; I'm simply trying to convey the message that no one can live in a crack. I'm not blind to the realities of this world; therefore I didn't 'cut my finger' once in this blog; I'm merely trying to say, don't grieve Fortune; we all make mistakes but mistakes can't be a lifestyle. (live in a crack)

[Naughtorious]

To be human is to have weaknesses, Naught, and I know you're intelligent enough to understand that.

So in relation to all this let me ask: What should be more forsaken: porn or hubris?

To be human. Yes. I admit to my weakness. Such as now. I do not state this with hope. I do not state this with a God. I state this with the sheer acceptance of what I've lost in my life. I watched the world change since my childhood and it's almost as if there never was a middle. My mind consciously did not take heed to what was inbetween and the result I get from this is friends who have long passed or are long caught up in life's matured situations. I say this with every ounce of my being. I have eaten a hole into my reality. This hole can not be filled by anything. I cannot live in my past nor mourn over the lost. I have to keep going. I cannot tug onto my ankles from my past. I will continue to steer my way as this godless being who only soughts for a simple break in this corrupt, chaotic, arbitrary, cold mysterious world the lot attempts to turn into something worth living in. That's the difference between people and I. I live because I live. I do not live for reward and personal security. I live because I am what I am and not what I think I am. I don't need a God... I need a friend who I can communicate with. Because I'm still human underneath my intellect. Yet. I have nobody to share these emotions with because I chose a way of discipline that many do not follow or despise through and through.

What should be more forsaken? Hubris. Hubris is the leading problem behind our social, political and human affairs.

[Whitedragon]

Some pornography is as much an extreme as hubris; religious reprimand should not be confused for hubris in this case. The only difference between hubris and pornography is in hubris people may kill over religion; in pornography people injure themselves, because their lusts drive them, that's why they're happy to call it art. For as long as it works, of course.

-- Updated December 17th, 2012, 8:07 am to add the following --

I have a problem with pornography, because like many insidious things, it is a shadow; shadows may have fine curvatures and even be art, but only serves a subsequent purpose and doesn't lead you to the source/object. While the sun shines and there is light there is no urgency; it is when the sun starts setting and the shadows start disappearing that one realize the source/object can not be found in darkness. Tomorrow is another day … yes; but I am not willing to waste anymore of my days on shadows, because there may come a day that the sun does not rise for me again. I'd rather be with my girlfriend or my wife than with a shadow; the worse part is when the sun rises for you again, but leaves you lonely with regrets.

[Misty]

Some pornography is as much an extreme as hubris; religious reprimand should not be confused for hubris in this case. The only difference between hubris and pornography is in hubris people may kill over religion; in pornography people injure themselves, because their lusts drive them, that's why they're happy to call it art. For as long as it works, of course.

-- Updated December 17th, 2012, 8:07 am to add the following --

I have a problem with pornography, because like many insidious things, it is a shadow; shadows may have fine curvatures and even be art, but only serves a subsequent purpose and doesn't lead you to the source/object. While the sun shines and there is light there is no urgency; it is when the sun starts setting and the shadows start disappearing that one realize the source/object can not be found in darkness. Tomorrow is another day … yes; but I am not willing to waste anymore of my days on shadows, because there may come a day that the sun does not rise for me again. I'd rather be with my girlfriend or my wife than with a shadow; the worse part is when the sun rises for you again, but leaves you lonely with regrets.

Hello Whitedragon,

If you wake lonely and with regrets, it is your duty to yourself and others, to rise above being lonely with regrets and seek warmth by making new memories with who and what is available to you. Get out of the gutter so to speak. One simple act of kindness to another can change a lonely person into a person exercising agape love.

[Whitedragon]

Hi Misty

For sure! I agree one hundred percent with you. That's why I was doing missionary work in prison for quite a while. However it stopped when our pastor retired and moved away. I try to be as kind as possible to people; it may not seem so from this blog and some of my posts, but I'm actually very patient and tolerant. I am usually the one who can be found sacrificing a lot, so other people can be happy. Although I'm waking alone at this point, I don't feel lonely anymore. 2012 has made me grown and I have buried a lot of my demons, and sort out all my skeletons. It is very special to give your time and love to the less fortunate, like prisoners. They really have so few people that care; seeing new hope on their faces always made me glad … that was agape to me; I also did community service at a tuberculosis hospital. Waking alone and waking lonely is not the same for me anymore. My sorrow was with me for a long time; and yeah sometimes it still gets to me a bit, like when I talked about it on the forum, but as I say the tears are golden to me. I did have a relationship again, and I know in time I'll find someone again.

Thanks for your post,

[Misty]

Dear Whitedragon,

You are a man of honor. You are in tune with real love. Your posts are quite loving and honest. Thank you for your teachings.

your friend, Misty

[Supine]

I was insinuating that Naugtorious accusations of "weakness" (of WD's convictions or emotional, psychological reliance on the supernatural "First Cause") might be regarded as hubris to some. Mind you, likely religious minded people. Not to deter this into a religious debate or discussion, but it often seems the case to me that most (not all but that vast majority) atheist do speak with the sort of arrogance and presumption one would regard as hubris.

Don't take that as an intended attack on you, Naught. Accurate or not that is my impression of some of your comments. Overall I like you though.

But back to porn.... (I don't want to derail this into ad hominens or fair or unjust critiques of posters personalities).

[Whitedragon]

Thanks Supine,

I do admit, some of my posts here was a bit extreme; I don't usually allow my emotions to take me over, but this is a very emotional topic for me, considering. I do apologize if I have offended anyone, or acted unreasonable or foolish, but I guess my passion just got the better of me. I have made many statements on the topic here; I think I've really said all there is to say. Aside from giving an overt emotional testimony I think I have supplied this blog with more than enough logic and philosophy. I really poured a lot of creativity in to my potter story, and I think it does explain and do justice to all considerations. Please understand, I felt that I really had to share my story; I thought if people heard first hand how pleasure can become agony, they would maybe be a little bit less keen to overindulge in it. The religious elements are part of who I am; I will not apologize for it, that would defeat its purpose. All I can say, I wandered this world without spirituality for a long time, (or rather a false sense of it). I couldn't have broken the chains without that divine guidance and love.

[Fleetfootphil]

So how did a perfectly interesting topic get sidetracked and hijacked into sad-sack stories of a personal life poorly lived?

There are three levels of discussion. From lowest to highest they are: people, things, ideas. This discussion sunk even below that to people talking about themselves, in lament. God knows I am a tolerant and kind man but listening to people talk about themselves in a place dedicated to philosophy and art really seems useless and pointless. I look to hear discussion at least up to the level of things. Maybe after we talk about things for a while, we can graduate to ideas.

And, I have been censured twice now by managers and members because the things I say and the way I say them seem too much for this board. People don't want confrontative statements but I don't have any use for mamby-pamby and soothing banality. If anyone out there knows something I don't about art, language, philosophy, truth, honesty or candor, please share, but don't ask me to give a palliative 'cause I ain't got none.

Can someone tell me the value of this board. Does anyone get back more than they put into it or is it always less?

[Whitedragon]

Dear Fleetfoot,

Look I don't want to make enemies here; we all have a place here, because we are thinkers...

I hear what you're saying about the forum, and I'm sorry. Let's just get back to the topic then? However I think you'll find that any reasonable person will tell you that you can sometimes get the levels of discussion the wrong way round, especially in this case. Things and ideas are built on people, not the other way around. Btw, I wasn't the one who reported you, though I had cause to do so. As I said I did have a lot of interesting ideas, which I presented to this blog. I also shared my life story, some liked it, some didn't, but god knows I did it with good intentions. If I got a bit emotional; it's only because of my dismay, and the insults that rained down upon me from some. I only have one such life story, and to let it go to waste seemed empty to me. Why can't one talk about one's life on a philosophical forum, since life inspires so much philosophy?